Affairs Of The Heart

Where Reason Surrenders To Reality

Relationships can get complicated. Personalities can clash, circumstances can create stresses, values you never knew you had can sneak up on you and cause problems in relationships.

Living in harmony in a relationship is truly bliss. There is nothing better, but how long can a good relationship last? With all the tensions in our lives it is easy to lose the joy that brought the relationship into existence in the first place.

Parents fight with children, children fight with their siblings, fights break out among good friends, good friends get together and fight with other groups of good friends in the form of gangs. Political parties fight with each other and countries fight with other countries. What a mess.

When everyone knows the good feelings generated by good relationships why are there so many fights?

Good feelings come from good feelings.

Love comes from loving. Friendship comes from giving friendship. Harmony comes from a state of harmony within.

It is really a special experience to have a good friend that you can count on: Someone that loves you no matter what. Someone you can trust with your most intimate secrets. Someone that always has your best interests at heart.

However, how realistic is it to expect a person to always be there for someone else? When personal mental stresses and physical ailments create an imbalance within, the basis for expressing love and friendship has been lost. Good friends turn into enemies, lovers split apart, families scatter and countries go to war... All because the state of harmony within was lost.

The basis for good relationships is within.

When you go deep within, there is harmony. There is peace.

When you go deeper, you notice that the harmony turns into an ocean of love. Everything is experienced as infinitely dynamic, all encompassing happiness. The feeling of peace is so profound that no words can describe it.

Deep within you find that which never changes. You find a source of love and joy that is always available to you.

When you are in love with someone life becomes beautiful. You feel good and nothing bothers you. Life is a joy and everyone around you feels it through you. This is the same thing that happens when you go deep within.

Women have a special connection with the deepest aspects of nature. They seem to be able to connect with the "source" very easily. There is no greater joy than being with a woman who is at peace and feeling happy.

This is why it is advisable for a husband to protect his wife from the stresses of life and provide a beautiful environment for her to live in. It is purely selfish from a man's point of view, but it works from the woman's perspective also.

Unfortunately, traditions have taken this idea and turned it into a system where a woman is expected to provide the love and happiness in the family even if the man hasn't done his job of providing the stress-free, beautiful environment.

Parents experience the same thing. They are so in love with their children that they sacrifice everything just to see their children be happy. Nothing is more rewarding than to see your children be happy.

All this happiness is a result of connecting deep within yourself. There is an infinite ocean of happiness and love within you, deep in the essence of your being. The essence of your being is the same thing that physicists call the unified field. The unified field is the same in everyone and everything.

When two people are in love they instinctively know what the other person is feeling. They know what they need and want. Even without consciously recognizing the process, people in love "just know" the right thing to say or do.

The same holds true for close friends, parents, children and siblings.

Communication is instantaneous. It is clear. There is no doubt about what the other person is feeling even though no words are spoken.

Sometimes you find a person who is established in that deep state. Now, you can count on that person, just like you can count on the state of being when you go within yourself.

You may not be established deep within yourself. You may not have access to infinite peace, happiness and love within yourself all the time. But if you can find someone who does have that, he/she will be your best friend, forever.

The reason they will be there for you forever is because when the mind goes deep within it recognizes its own essential nature. When you break down the molecules and atoms further and further you get to the unified field. The unified field is eternal. The human mind in its essence is eternal. When a person's mind is firmly established in the eternity of the unified field, the love and joy of that field is a constant experience day in, day out.

The unified field within you and the the unified field within me is the same. There is not a separate unified field for everyone. It is the same field.

When a person is permanently merged with infinite love and happiness within, they are permanently merged with your essential nature. They are you. They will love you as you love you. They will be there for you just as you are there for you. Through thick and thin, good and bad they will be there. You can count on them.

Traditionally, this kind of person is called a Guru. The word Guru has been loosly translated as "teacher" or "spiritual guide". That is a very limiting description of the word.

A Guru is the deepest most personal part of you. When a person established in the essence of Self comes into contact with you, the person is actually the deepest, most personal part of you. He/she knows...just knows all about you. If you develop an honest relationship with this type of person you open up a channel to the deepest aspects of your own being. You come into contact with the eternal ocean of love and happiness within you.

People often experience great happiness in the company of a Guru. They say that the Guru makes them happy. That's not really true. The Guru is simply you, in essence. Because the Guru is near you, you have easy access to the source of all love and happiness in the universe. It is your own happiness. The Guru has simply made it possible for you to access it.

When you have a real Guru, you instinctively know what will make him/her happy. If you follow that feeling, you will find your own happiness. You will find your way out of your problems. Life will become bliss. Following a (real) Guru is the quickest, surest path to eternal happiness.

It is not necessary for your Guru to be alive. My Guru died six years before I was born. His name is Swami Brahmanand Saraswati. He was given the title of "Jagadguru", the Guru of the whole universe. Jesus, Buddha, Guru Nanak, Mahaveer Jain and Abraham are also Gurus because they are (were) completely established within the unified field, the Self deep within their mind. When someone becomes permanently established in the Self, they become eternal, like the unified field. It doesn't matter whether they have a body or not. Following them will be as effective as following a Guru who still has their body.

The surest path to having good relationships in your life is to first have a good relationship with your Guru. Any Guru will do. If the Guru is real, you will quickly find that your problems melt away. You will find you are happy regardless of the circumstances. Life will become easy.

You can look for the reasons why this is true or not true. Having reasons or not having them won't matter. Whether you understand it or not the results will be there. Simply find (or pick) a Guru and follow your heart. Ask yourself "how would my Guru feel about this". You will develop an uncanny ability to always pick the right path. Luck will favour you at all times.

Following your Guru is the golden path in life.

Today is Guru Poornima. This is the day the moon is the brightest it will be all year. Today is a good day to thank your Guru for being there. Today is the day to acknowledge that all good things in your life became possible because your Guru led you to your happiness. Today is the day to satisfy all affairs of the heart.

Jai Guru daiv.